Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
