Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
