maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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