i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
