i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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