No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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