singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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