I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
only if we run a train.
done.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
