But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
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