as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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