her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
