This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
