why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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