The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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