im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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