I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm passing your future prison.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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