Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
