Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just gargled with NyQuil
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Randomize
