Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
third nipple confirmed
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
