i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
