So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Randomize
