SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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