no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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