WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
