I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Randomize