Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
