Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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