So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Randomize
