At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize