To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
