Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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