I wish I only lived at night.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
A+ Viking dick
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
