I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
