this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
