I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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