i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
