I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
our cab driver is having phone sex.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
