The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
