just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
