If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
