last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
