Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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