Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
