I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
