Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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