It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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