Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize