dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
