as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
