I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
